Today in class we talked a little about parenting. Specifically we were discussing if we would let our children use media and what rules we were going to enforce with them. I said that I was not going to let my children watch a lot of TV, that they would be limited. My teacher asked me how I was going to do that? Like there was no way to control whether or not your child is going to watch TV. I told him that my child will not be in control of the remote, that if they wanted to watch it then they would have to ask and if I said no, then that means no.
My teacher then proceeded to tell me a story about how his grandchildren came to his house this past weekend and how they were terrors. Running around Wal-Mart, kicking, screaming, thowing fits, and their parents giving in and giving them whatever they want.
To this I told him that I was raised to respect my parents. Yes sir, yes ma'am. You don't talk back, you don't throw fits. And that this was how I was going to raise my children. If I told them they were not going watch TV then they weren't going to watch it. And if they threw a fit about it then they would get a time-out or a spanking.
To some, this may seem extreme. Why not just turn on the TV so your kid will shut up and be out of your hair? Just give them what they want, its not that big of a deal. Remember those children that you see at the grocery store, stomping and screaming really loud because they want the candy or the toy? And you say, why can't those parents control their kids? That is why. When you let your children dictate what they get and when they get it then they are controling you. You no longer become the authoritarian in the household, your child is.
Some would also say that when parents raise their children like this then they are going to resent their parents and be even worse children. To me, you must create a balance in your household. You can't just tell you kids the way it is and then shut them in their room for four hours a night. You need to spend quality time with them, and show them caring and love. You need to be a parent. Which means being a caregiver, and authoratative figure, a guider amongst many other things. I'm not going to tell my kids no just for the heck of it, and sometimes if they ask for something I might oblige, but I'm going to use my best judgement to decide what I should do in each situation. Whether that be a spanking, a lecture, a friendly chat, a no, or even a yes. One thing is for certain, I will demand respect from my children. Plain and simple. I am their parent. The Bible says to honor your father and mother. Honor is defined as the highest form of respect. That's biblically what we should expect from our children, and the only way they will learn that is if you enforce it.
It will be my responsibility as a parent and as a Christian to raise children that will go into the world and better society. Through their attitudes, their actions, and their relationships. The road to get there... well, that's your choice. I've made mine.
Proverbs 13:24 - "Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them."
Proverbs 23:13 - "Do not withhold discipline from a child..."
Exodus 20:12 - "Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you"
