I am sitting in the living room of my new suite in Florida, posting this blog.  I look back to six months ago and I can hardly believe that I am sitting where I am right now.  It took a lot to get here and to be completely honest I never thought that it would happen.  Now here I am and its happening as I speak.

The trip down to Florida was great.  I drove and my sisters rode with me.  We stopped at hotels and restaurants, and the beach.  It was a complete blast and I was actually really excited for Southeastern, and I was quite anxious to get there.  Once I got there I met my suite mates and moved into my room and continued spending time with Tash and Mary and I would spend a little time with my suite mates.  But Monday, oh Monday is when it all hit me.

I drove Tash and Mary to the airport and said my good-byes, and as I was pulling away from the curb I could feel the tears welling in my eyes.  So I decided to be the sappy girl I am, I pulled out my ipod and I put on 'All by Myself' by Celine Dion.  And I cried and I sang at the top of my lungs as I was driving down the highway (and yes, I'm sure it was a great sight).  But then I just stopped and thought to myself, how is this helping me at all?  How is singing about how alone I am going to make me feel any better?  And I swear I just felt the calling of the Lord to put on some sort of worship music.

So I flipped through my ipod searching for a song that I felt would be good, and 'Wrap me in Your Arms' popped out at me so I put it on repeat and let it go.  It was then that the Lord began to speak to me.  Now I am quite the stubborn person, so I began to argue with God (and ya, your never going to win that fight).  But I told Him how mad I was.  How he brought me so far from home all by myself and left me feeling like this.  Why would he do that to me?  Why couldn't he just have let me stay in Iowa with all of my family and friends?  Why in the world would you want me to feel like this God?

And my God being such a patient and loving God as He is let me argue with him, or more, He let me rant at Him.  And his answer came simply;

"You need to learn to let Me and only Me support you"

You see this is my problem.  I rely on my family and my friends, I rely on the comfort of my everyday life and so I never step outside of my box.  God knew this, I did not.  I was basically so content with my relationship with God that I stopped building it.  I sat in church, I played on worship team, I talked about faith, but I was no longer seeking God with passion and fire.  Somewhere along the way I had lost it; all because of comfort and contentedness.

This is why God took me from Iowa and moved me here.  Where I can no longer rely on my family, and I can no longer rely on my friends, I can no longer rely on the ordinary.  The only person that I can rely on now is God.  And He worked this all out so that is how it would end up.

I love what our campus pastor said the other day in chapel, because it applies so infinitley to my life.  He was talking about how we go around all the time questioning and debating and fighting the question: Can I trust God?  Can I trust God?  And the answer is always Yes, Yes and 100% yes.  The question isn't can you trust God, its can He trust you?

I was sitting there saying 'God I don't know if I can trust you.  I don't know if I can do this.  I just don't know God.'  And that is so wrong because, let me map this out for you here:

GOD KNOWS WHAT HE IS DOING

Even before you were formed in the womb he knew how many hairs were on your head.  He knows who you are, who knows what you need, and he knows the plan for your life.  You can guess and plan all you want, in the end God is always right.