I was given a lot to think about tonight. I have been thinking these thoughts for awhile, but I never really knew where to go with them. It is just a cacophony of thoughts going in an array of ways. I don't know what to do. I'm deciding between quite a number of different things and I have no idea which is right, which thing would be the best and I don't know what to decide, AT ALL. I hate being so confused, and I hate the feeling of uncertainty. I feel... well, alone. And I feel, as I've said, confused, and lost and just plain baffled. And then I think that maybe some of my feelings are for a reason. Like, maybe I'm not supposed to be comfortable because its not where I'm supposed to be. Maybe it's God's way of telling me that He wants a change in my life. Like Pastor Rooks sermon about 'Putting Rocks in the Nest.' Maybe it wont feel right until it's HIS kind of right.
m
a
y
b
e
I quite hate that word becuase there is absolutely no certainty in that word. Which I guess explains my life at the moment. It shouldn't be a struggle. Is that right? I never thought of it like that. But I just don't know. Maybe it will be different in a few weeks? I'm lost in a world where there aren't any answers, atleast not at the moment. I'm in a state of prayer, yes thats right, warfare prayer. I shall not be confused for much longer!
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